By francisflute
I think my friends — and I emphasize, that they still are my friends — were playing a joke on me when they they took me there for the first time. They built it up, “Oh, we’ve gotta go there,” they said. They made it seem like Atlanta’s best. I expected something very special. But all they have on the menu at the Varsity in Atlanta are little hamburgers and hot dogs — and they are awful.
Others have noticed the same thing:
Maybe I am just not — with it. Surely, dull, tasteless food is a statement on all the failed mortgages. Maybe you’re supposed to order your dog naked, with nothing on it and pay too much for it. It’s a protest; an act of solidarity with the foreclosed and overextended. Could it be the Varsity is on the inclined edge of a new fashion; a bold, bad food chic?
No. I guess not. One person said, “I feel sorry for Atlanta if this is what they boast about.” That can’t be over stated; the food is just bad. Some are demure, saying, “Well, it’s not that good.” No! That won’t do it. The food is of poor quality. It is inadequate; inferior. I don’t say it is decayed or spoiled. It is rather lacking in savor; incompetent in execution both of quantity and quality.
Yes, its greasy junk food. And many complain about that fat and grease. But really, everything taken in moderation and a greasy burger or fatty dog once in a while is alright, if it tastes good and it is what you like. A little moderation; easy discipline. It is all you need. Grease is not the Varsity’s infamy.
And I have nothing but praise for the Varsity’s decor. It is a polished red brick on white tile design in emblematic Ford T-bird motif. Nostalgic but with big modern wide screen TVs high on the wall to watch the game and a clever use of classroom desks for seating.
Of course the service is brusque. “What’ll ya have?” they say. Some say its rude, but I think it’s their shtick; there gimmick, their way of barking at you and saying hello. I saw it for that and it heightened my anticipation. I answered, “I’ll have some good food.” But what a fall from that height with the meal they gave me.
How do I say this? Eating the Varsity food is a foul and miserable ordeal. A rueful experience. Look at your hamburger. How could they forget the meat? No, there it is; the size of a poker chip. At least the lettuce leaf is crisp, but it’s meager and slapped on off-center. No tomato; pickles? And just think, you paid $4.00 for it. Let’s be honest. The Varsity is just a ridiculous parody of a restaurant; an embarrassment. Atlantans who brag on it; who say it is “an institution,” what am I to think?
The Varsity Sucks Blog 